Hospital stay #2, day 2

We spent the weekend bargaining. Although resolved to her fate, we still wound up not going to the hospital, until Sunday. Each day brought new cuts. She's using the lancets as her favored weapon these days...

On Friday, H tried calling her mother, although didn't call her best friend, as her friend usually does most of the talking, and H just needed someone to listen. Desperately. I think it was part of the bargaining process: wanting a second opinion.

• You have to understand that her first hospital stay was not very positive. They never are. Hospitals have to be excruciatingly strict, and can't afford to rewrite the rules for each individual case. The local hospital, additionally - or rather, subtractionally - didn't have anyone on staff who had ever dealt with DID. In fact, not only were they excited by her tragedy enough to want to book her a speaking engagement (wtf? she's barely even begun her therapy!), but at least one nurse was thoughtless enough to advise that she "just stop" being crazy. Well... et cetera, etc., &c.

Fearing a breakdown in communication, as both her and her mother had been casually avoiding calling each other, i sent her mother a message on Facebook pleading her to answer her phone or call H back. She called, explaining that her phone had died, and offered to come down right away. (We live a little over an hour away.) So Saturday was spent with H's mom and stepdad, and was overall a pretty good day, really.

But by Sunday morning, it was clearly time to act. Any more cuts and she'd have to start re-using space before it had healed - not to mention that i'd be liable for not taking her in for too long a time.

She's not been having a great time since. They won't let her have Ativan, so instead are giving her some other unpronounceable thing. The psychiatrist is cranky as hell with her. They barely understand the new-fangled insulin calculation method (which has been around for at least a couple years now). They make her sleep with the light on, and a group session touched her arm uninvited, which triggered an episode of lost time as well as a nice crying jag afterward. Do they not realize that some of their patients are in there because of some kind of past trauma?

Oh, and i found a paperclip on the floor in her room, just begging to be driven into flesh.

To be continued....