Addendum

So last night was not pleasant, but my simplified, condensed version was a little dramatic, not to mention how bent out of shape i was at the time i typed it. Suffice it to say that H and i were both a little unprepared for each other's reactions. She was, in her own words, being a brat (really, i would say not so much a brat but just a little needy and whiny), and i was being negatively defensive. We both became hypersensitive and things got blown out of proportion.

I did kick the hell out of the baby-gate, and i did noisily throw the hell out of the trash into the dumpster. I did yell a bit. She did cry. I did hand her the phone, angered that she implied that i had injured her by applying peroxide to her fresh cuts, which she did lock herself in the bathroom to apply, leaving me to attempt to force my way in to stop her from doing so. She did open the door while i was making this attempt.

We did apologize to one another.

Such is stress. Things get out of hand, exacerbated by this intense thing she is experiencing, which seems now to be a combination of schizophrenia and dissociative identity disorder. I get overly frustrated.

To be honest, i thought that things would get better as i started working and bringing in a little income to help with the bills, but in reality, i am more unavailable, and have in fact yet to see my first check, much less my first full paycheck, which will rarely ever have full-time hours posted within.

Also i have been rather sick lately, and working in a very hot environment. The car's timing belt is in dire need of repair, and thanks to the design of the New Beetle's engine, if it breaks it could cause serious engine damage which we cannot afford. So along with that worry, i take my breaks in a hot, non- air-conditioned vehicle, parked out in the hot summer sun. I come home worn the fuck out and having to face the painful reality of her mental state is not at all a welcome respite from anything.

Even so, i overreacted badly. Everything is a learning experience now.